Lies

maybe these weeks i'm overjoyed. i didn't know why, but now i do know why.

it's because i'm trying to tell myself that just screw everything that bothers me and appreciate life even more.

and i couldn't be more satisfied with myself. ( pat myself on the back)

i'm no perfect human being, i'm not. people hate me, people like me, how to pleased people, and everything that bothers me.

maybe i'm not 100% saying to screw stuffs, but i do know what really matters for me now.

these day i'm being happily blunt about everything, and yes you can called me a selfish person now, and i am happy.

it's for my own sake, i can never please everyone, because i have my own flaws and i live for my own, for my own story and not being someone sidekick, no.

i guess my boyfriend is the first person that makes me believe that i have to be honest. fully honest.

because before i learnt to be honest, i always bottled up my emotions and trying to convince my boyfriend about what i dislike about him with just giving a simple hint, that he didn't even notice.

so he fed up and told me that he's not a mind reader, so i have to tell him what i hate about him, even it's hurts him.

and that's what i do now, no more grunge.

i guess being polite, and saying what others want to hear is a part of my country's culture.

which is nice, but do people have to bottle up everything that bothers them until they fed up and lashing out everything? or do they have to tell a lie so everything looks just fine?

i know truth is sometimes hurts and you just want to sprinkle it with sweet lies, but is it necessary?